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Ok, so me and my son (soon 3 y/o and currently ALMOST potty trained) are taking a shower...and outta the blue he starts yellin' "pee-pee, pee-pee ? ?"

I tell the little bro to just let it go in the shower and he looks all confused at me...finally he says..."Potty?"

I said, "No BOY! Pee in the shower - we don't wanna get the floor all wet"......so he reluctantly takes a leak in the shower...

I felt kinda peeved cause I know mommie is telling him not to go in the shower (she hates it when I do that)....but it's conflicting with his MANLY training from dad...


As well, (I think I mentioned this before) but wifey is REAL home remedies person and RARELY if EVER uses OTC meds....I'm kinda the opposite...and we can get into some real battles when the kids are sick...

Anyway...how do you parents deal with conflicting spousal values when training the kids?

I just have to think to myself "Is it worth the battle?" and go from there....luckily, I guess since I'm home all day with Andie, Ty pretty much "bows to my authority" (read: :whip: ) when it comes to those kinds of decisions. No, seriously...the only thing we "slightly" differ on is punishment. He's more apt to jump right in with warning then spanking....I've started more with time outs....but I noticed the other night he followed my lead on that one...

About the peeing in the shower thing...he taught Andie to do that, too... :rollseyes: What is it with you men? OH! AND they were out in our "back 40" the other day, he goes out behind his workshed to take a leak...SHE wanted to do it, too! Thankfully, he explained to her that girls don't go potty outside because there's no toilet paper....and the subject was dropped. :blink:

We had this problem with our daughter in the shower. My DH the plumber, explains to her (in way too much detail) that it's waste water and goes to the same place. So now she's all freaked out about flushing the toilet when her little brother is in the bathtub - like it's going to wash up into the tub. :doh: Thank you Daddy.

We often disagree on the punishments. Tommy will lose it quicker than me most of the time which ends up in someone crying (not my DH!) over something that could have been handled more calmly.

I try to bring it up away from the kids, but sometimes I'll give him a look like - hey stop being so psychotic. Then he'll catch himself and change his approach.

We shoould always try to present ourselves as a united front with the kids, but it can be hard. When you're the SAHP you're with the kids all day so you sort of have a groove, a way you handle things. It's confusing when Daddy comes home and reacts in a way that's different from Mommy.

That's how I usually handle it...I mean, when he's started the punishment or whatever, I never step in & tell him he's not doing it effectively, or whatever....sometimes he catches the "look"...sometimes not (or chooses to ignore it)...then I make sure to mention it later...

Being the Daddy (who, like Tommy, has a tendency to go overboard on discipline) AND the SAHP (who, like y'all, has a groove in which things are handled), things go a little differently around here. The girls are very well behaved when it's only me. But when Mommy comes home -- they're suddenly the epitome of evil. Where the heck did that come from?

Chores and lessons are dropped in mid-completion. Toys are dragged out. "Mommy! Play with me!" is all that we hear until the screaming commences before bedtime.

Perhaps I'm overbearing and I (in defiance of Biblical instruction) exasperate my children. Mommy is not the type to let them get away with murder, but she is easier going than me. So now, the kids try to walk all over her. She is tired when she comes home from work. There are times when she simply does not want to play with the girls. There are other times when scheduling does not allow it. But Nichole, our six-year-old, insists on playing with Mommy. When she doesn't get her way before bedtime, the screaming starts.

One night, Nichole started that screaming. Her little sister, who imitates everything she does, started screaming as well. Mommy screamed "Stop it!" I told Nichole, in a remarkably calm voice (perhaps it was calm like a serial killer is calm :o ), "Nichole don't make that noise. When you make that noise, then Kristen makes that noise and then Mommy makes THAT noise."

Last night, the belt (which I've never used on the kids) came out. Nichole's screaming had gone WAY too far. It immediately shut her up, and all it was doing was sitting on the back of the couch.

I'm working on my "Board of Education". I've got my dremel tool out and I'm engraving "Big Daddy's Board of Education" on a paddle. I'm going to paint the letters and seal the whole thing in urethane. Then I'll hang it up in the playroom as a piece o' art. When the kids misbehave, down comes the paddle. A friend of mine had one with a smiley face and yarn 'hair'. Its name was "Paddy". It sat at the dinner table with the kids...

Honestly, I'm not sure there are many, if any, battles like Squat talks about. The wife & I agree on most everything. When we haven't - we just talk about them and work something out.

Who says we deal with it? He submits to me and that's how it is! :whip:

Kidding!

Lately, I have found that when the kids are going bonkers and it's hard to hear each other, I'm the one who's actually hollering out ideas/instructions and hubby amazingly repeats what I've been saying. It almost seems like I DO have the upper hand around here because I'm in contact with the kids all the time and knows what works. BUT...when hubby is set in his way, he can be so stubborn. He will glare me down and set both feet down and tell me where I'm standing at that moment. So, I back off. Whether it's to time-out the child or spank or what have you.

Now peeing in the shower is no biggie to me or hubby. We both do it all the time and like Lynn's hubby said...really, it's not a big deal. But like Deb said, too. Is it worth a battle? Or should we just let it slide? Then again, you don't want to confuse the poor lil kids so ya gotta tread carefully. Like, sometimes I don't always agree with Abe, but when he's doing something HIS way, I do tell the kids to obey their father and they do. It's a constant learning process.

Oh and I always know when hubby's been sneaking behind my back. Like giving the kids candy when they're not supposed to! :naughty:

I always know too...they tell on him! It's so funny!

I forgot about peeing in the shower - that's just plain nasty in my book!

When I was in the Navy, we had big 'community' showers. One guy was peeing in the shower! It was coming over by MY feet! :sick: Man, that was nasty! Ever since then, the shower is not the place for pee.

'Course, my wife does it if I'm tying up the throne. And she's taught the kids to do it. Unfortunately, they don't realize you're not supposed to pee in the tub if you've got it full of bath water...