Or maybe vice versa?

My family never had a kind word for my husband. It's all very surface, because aside from my parents and my sisters, none have ever spent any time to get to know him. And I guess it's based on his past alcohol and drug problems. Just to give you an idea, when we got engaged one of my SILs said something like -- oh, we're sorry. But know that we'll be here for you when it doesn't work out. Then one of my cousins protested the wedding and just wouldn't attend.

In the past I just thought, well, time will prove them wrong. It doesn't matter, because honestly it's none of their business anyway. And I haven't given it much thought. Until today. A mutual friend of my brother and I said something to me today in reference to a conversation she'd had with my brother like "Well, you know how your brother feels about your husband." I felt like someone punched me in the gut. How could they have bad feelings after 16 years! My gosh, we're married 11 years. Even as I read what I've written here I'm wondering why I even care or why it hurts me.

Anyone else have stupid brothers who say stupid things!!

NOt really. My personality has changed since I married. I am more tense and uptight. They recognize this I have not been able to be very involved at all with family get-togethers, I live an hour away and cannot visit them alone, he and the kids always have to be stuck to my side at all times. All these things combined with his indecisivness, stubbornness, and selfishness in certain situations have painted a not so good picture of him for them. They see that I am not as happy as I used to be before and my stresses weigh me down considerably. I was notlike this before he came around, so no, they don't have the most perfect opinion of him..

I'm blessed in that my extend families get along so well together...my "blood" family and my in-law family are all great.

That's not to say that sometimes we get on each other's nerve, or that there aren't certain aspects of, say, my BIL or SIL that I personally couldn't live with...but nothing major...

I can imagine, Lynn, that it would bother you to hear your brother still feels this way. However, it WAS second-hand information, so until you hear it directly from the horse's mouth, I'd take it with a grain of salt. Besides, YOU know how awesome your DH is (and so do we...;) )....and that's all that matters.

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My family is all dead.

threadkiller

My mom hates both of her daughters-in-law. She doesn't come out and say it, but she's really cold to both of them.

My MIL - I'd rather spend a week with her than a day with my mom. Sad, I know.

My immediate family all love my wife... they're usually not too fond of me.....

my in-laws are starting to get to know me better and realize I'm not the abusive jerk my son paints me as...

Well I spoke too damned soon...

Had an altercation with son yesterday... He got violent, I tried to call the Sheriff, then he unpluged the phone pulled a knife, and if Misty hadn't tried to get between us one of us would be dead.

Finally got the cops to come out they talked to me then they talked to Zach, our preacher came out and we started to talk things through when My FIL showed up with a 2x4 to beat the hell out of me.

I'm getting so sick of it.