My husbadn passionately haes his job. Since the prospect of finding another one has come up he told me that since he will probably have to take a pay cut, that I should just be the one to go get a job and let him stay home with the kids and do the housework and homeschooling, since he would do better at it anyway.

We have fought over this very thing many times before, with him telling me how much I suck at the stay at home stuff..
There is no way that I could possibly get a job that pays enough to support the family expecially having been out of the work force for nearly 5 years..We cannt afford for him to take a cut either--we're barely making it now on less than 30,000 and there is no way that I could get a job that pays enough. What should I do? Should I just try to find a job and let him stay at home--since he swears he would be better than me and he hates being out around people and I desperately need to get away from the confines of this house--or should I help him find a job??

What kinda stuff are you good at?

I don't know..could you be more specific?

What do you consider your employable skills to be?

I see that you can type. Is there anything else you can see yourself doing, but being paid for?

I honestly don't know....really...have no clue........

I think it also doesn't help that i didn't get to finish college because of three unexpected pregnancies.... I tried, but with the kids I really couldn't devote the time necessary to do school work. so technically I am only a high school graduate... that is not such a good thing in the world of employment.. :(

well, start looking through the Sunday classifieds....you could post your resume on Monster.com or one of those other sites like that just to see what's out there....

I know when I was working (secretarial/billings), I wasn't making more than $30K, that's for sure....it was between $20K & $25K....

But the problem is that if I do get a job, I need to make enough to be the sole income for a family of five...

well,yeah....that's what I was trying to say....I don't know how reasonable it is for your DH to expect you to find an entry-level job making at least 30K.... :unsure:

He doesn't expect me to be able to. He seems to think that if we cancel internet, hang our laundry to dry and stuff that we'll be able to cut our financial need y hundreds per month n won't need a higher paying job.. :wall: He often has no realistic concept of reality. I guess this is is one of his "endearing" qualities that has pissed me off for nearly six years. We already live on a very low budget. There is nothing that would cut our need by hundreds per month--short of someone paying off our house for us..

I hear ya....we cut back drastically when we moved into this new house so we could make the house payments, but it was nowhere NEAR "hundreds" per month...MAYBE $100 to $150/month....

Give it a shot. It'll either work or give hubby a wake up call. Either way things will be better for you.

I guess I'll start looking and working on a resume...scary though..My fear is what do I do about getting the bills paid? I cannot possibly risk putting us all in financial peril, more so than we already are...that would be stupid..

Really, when you start going on interviews and getting offers....your DH will realize that you probably won't be able to bring home what he does/did.

String -- it may sound like I'm ASSUMING you're not good enough to get a job that makes over $30K....that's NOT the case!! I pray that you WILL find a job that pays well enough so you won't have these worrisome issues....:hug:

No-I am totally understanding of the realitites of this. I personally don't think I can get a job with that much income......

I heard a pastor once say that life on earth is as close to hell as a Christian will ever get so of course it's going to suck. Work is a four letter word. I'm sorry if I seem like I'm being forward or rude but I will say that your husband needs to suck it up and do whatever it takes to support his family. If we want to wax Biblical on the subject I'm sure he realizes that he's commanded to take care of his family. Die to yourself and live for your family, remember how important to you they are and all that. I always think back to when I wanted to buy an engagement ring for my wife and how much overtime and work I did to make it. If properly motivated a man will rise to any occasion. He might be bitter about his job but I have just three words for him, SUCK IT UP!

(I do think that squat is your hubby and I love the guy and we all have weak times, sometimes we just need to be told to suck it up... I know I do!)

Squat's not her hubby. B)

Squat!! Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooooooo!!!



But I understand what you're sayin....

"Suck it up"....hmmm, that's what I say alot! :D Personally, I probably couldn't handle a full-time job and support my family and pay the bills and look after the mortgage and cook meals and clean house and laundry and make sure everyone is happy and staying sane....INCLUDING myself...no. That SO would not work around here. Oh AND keeping up with what's going on at school! No way! Hubby is here to support us financially and to deal with the financial situations. Now, I have no problem with moms going out and working and dads staying home if they for some reason or other just cannot keep up with a full-time job. But a husband who says "since he swears he would be better than me and he hates being out around people" will likely have another thing coming to him if and once he does get dropped into your shoes. JMHO.
I dunno....I kinda agree with seige here...

I pity any woman married to that Squat dude....

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Squat's a good bro....

Look for a job. Just see what happens String. You never know. And then wait until your husband sees how much fun it is having to hang clothes every day.

Honestly, it sounds like he's just feeling overwhelmed. I doubt, with his values (and pride), that he's going to want you to be the only source of income in your home. I think this will all blow over either when you can't find a job that pays more than $10 an hour to start or he's changed a week's worth of poopie diapers.

Ya know - with the US Cellular gay pride thing, this just might work in your favor.

[Clay puts on evil grin :eyebrows: ]

While he's looking for work, you find a job - quickly. He'll be a stay-at-home dad. I'm available if he wants to talk to someone about it...

Oh, yeah - this could work quite well! :whistle: